I had been having pains in my right side for a few days and last night finally decided to go to the hospital. I thought it might be my appendix and really didn't want to leave it any longer. So I went to the University Hospital Emergency Room and it wasn't very busy at all, which surprised me because it was a Friday night. After signing in and being assessed, I got the pleasure of my own little curtained area. Where I got the equal pleasure of changing into those stupid hospital gowns. Those things should be outlawed. Anyway after about 30 minutes a nurse (who was originally from Texas and wasn't particularly enjoying her job in Canada) came and took 3 vials of my blood. I must admit I looked away and knew immediately it was going to leave a bad bruise. So she took my blood and off it went to be analyzed. I am definitely not a hypochondriac but when you are sitting there looking at multi-coloured curtains waiting for blood results it is easy to suffer from hypochondria. I started imagining everything that could be possibly wrong while listening to a guy on my left struggling breathing and coughing his smoker's cough. No wonder they came and hooked him up to oxygen. On my right was a man in his 60's who had been suffering chest pains and they were running tests along with asking him questions. I laughed out loud when he couldn't come up with a number of drinks he drank a week, he said that depended. The doctor asked him what it depended on and I think he said the day of the week, which is acceptable. I think he finally settled on 14 drinks a week, which is more than me. I drink 6-12 but they are usually in one night. Anyway they changed nurses and a coloured nurse from one of the Caribbean islands, well that is what I decided came and asked me if I could provide some urine. So I got up and proceeded to the restroom, in my fancy blue gown, and provide the asked for urine. After that my side really didn't hurt that much, well it throbbed but I just wanted to go home to bed and out of the hospital. The young doctor came, examined me and then he left. This left me alone with the voices outside my curtain and the boredom of my thoughts. This wasn't exactly a good thing. I decided then I didn't want to be cut open, even if they wanted to take out my appendix. But my blood work and urine came back clean, imagine that, I am normal, blood wise anyway. The doctor examined me again and told me I would be fine. I asked him if it might be an ulcer and he laughed, so I guess that meant no. He said I might have pulled something or tore some tissue, or it might just be a virus. I was to go and if it got worse come back. So the nurse took my temperature again, 37.2 Celsius and the doctor gave her the thumbs up and I was allowed to go. But the nurse still had to remove the thing they put in my arm to get a vein and ripping it off, hurt like hell. All the arm hairs being pulled out of my arm, at that point I did feel like vomiting. A 3 hour tour. The bruising on my arm today is nice, like I thought it would be. I feel a little disoriented today and tired. I didn't sleep the best and need to get some more. I am supposed to go out for a birthday party tonight but unless I feel better after sleeping, that isn't happening.
"We have arrived too late to play the bleeding heart show...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=dH9Q4fsZ1IY
Yesterday before I went to hospital I watched the movie Gone Baby Gone. I was really impressed with this movie starring Casey Affleck, Ed Harris and in a minor role Morgan Freeman. The moral questions raised by this movie are immense and can only be answered by us as individuals. I often think children would be better off without their parents, if they are terrible parents but separating child from parent, can scar the child no matter what type of new life they are given. There are lots of people who say they are doing what is best for the child, but what is really best for the child. Of course there are some situations where it is obvious what is best for the child but there are other cases where it isn't as clear. Ben Affleck did a great job on this movie as its director. While I was watching this movie and in particular Ed Harris, I got to thinking about his best movies. So here are my favourite movies with him in them. Also further below is a better review of Gone Baby Gone.
A Beautiful Mind
Pollock
A History of Violence
Nixon
Enemy At The Gates
Glengarry Glen Ross
The Hours
The Truman Show
Apollo 13
http://movies.nytimes.com/2007/10/19/movies/19gone.html
"Well, I got all this time, to be waiting for what is mine, to be hating what I am, after the light has faded...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=eptGrk3gXfs
I was probably the only person in the world who noticed this during the Pittsburgh and Philadelphia hockey game last night. But after the Flyers tied the game at 1 there was a slight delay while they reviewed the goal. During this delay they played Hanging Around by Counting Crows in the arena and I thought this was cool. Pittsburgh won the game 4-2 with Malkin having a great game scoring twice and adding an assist. 7 more wins until they win the cup.
Now a few comments about the Toronto Blue Jays, Brad Wilkerson and Kevin Mench are not enough to turn this team around. They are below average baseball players trying to return to their previous state of barely average. J.P. Riccardi is grasping at straws, the only major improvement would be Barry Bonds or trading for a young everyday left fielder or a better first baseman or a young catcher. Of course they lost and Halladay fell to 3-5. He didn't pitch overly bad but was once again prone to the big inning. I love Roy and think he is in the top five pitchers in baseball but he is becoming way too prone to allowing the big inning. He will be cruising and then it is always one bad inning, I don't care how the inning happened, he has to learn to be better about limiting the damage. Or he will never lead Toronto to the playoffs. It would also help if they would give him more than 1-0 lead, especially when they have the chance to but they are offensively futile. Horrible.
I guess it is a matter of being safe than sorry. What is a little blood.
If you don't know the music of the New Phonographers, you should. They are really good.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=fI_XA-cLVww
john.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Friday, May 9, 2008
"The sun sets in flames as the city burns, another day gone down as the night turns, and I hold you here in my heart as things fall apart....."
Well it is Friday again and time for some more odd news. Well not necessarily odd but definitely disturbing.
"Insects pollinating Australian tongue orchids (Cryptostylis species) frequently ejaculate and waste copious sperm," they wrote in a report in The American Naturalist."
I think the quote above from the article says enough.
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/reuters/080508/odds/odd_orchids_deception_dc
"All 17 people got their left ears sliced off," Diop told Reuters. "We rushed to the place where it happened but we did not find the attackers," he said."
I found the story below bizarre and disturbing. Why just the left ears?
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/reuters/080508/world/international_senegal_casamance_dc
"The teenager then found three identical packets on the bottom of the freezer and opened one and saw the head and arm of an infant that was wrapped in a hand towel, police said."
As disturbing as the story above is, this one is equally as disturbing.
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5hsUSwR5Ai6n-HWj3tNdxUNA3zDyQD90FJ0S00
"My father said "Son, we're lucky in this town, it's a beautiful place to be born. It just wraps its arms around you, nobody crowds you and nobody goes it alone"
http://youtube.com/watch?v=PwLfgH6D_EA
The following is from the book I am currently reading called Bloodletting and Miraculous Cures by Vincent Lam.
"Blood bears the curse of human malice. This life fluid may conceal destruction, the way words and thoughts can kill unseen. Within blood the idea of death can flow."
"I removed the watch, turned it over. The watch was perfect, unmarked. The human bite is the dirtiest, the most foul, and destined for infection. Worse than dogs or cats, because the human mouth is full of filth."
"I got shackles on my wrist, soon I'll slip 'em and be gone, Chain me in a box in the river and I'll rise singin' this song..."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=WCVJny3Va4I
I actually felt like writing something yesterday, it wasn't magic and it didn't capture what I was trying to but it is something.
Not Capturing It
There has been a lack of creativity
Emanating from deep inside of me
During the last month or even longer
I have little desire to imagine or create
Observing life as usual but not capturing it
April quickly became May and now June waits
This city’s trees are more green and vibrant
Sunlight appears but does not always stay
Arriving like an expected and welcomed guest
Leaving like a lover wanting more time
I have come to some realizations lately
Not being ready for much and especially love
Giving up on writing and choosing to read instead
Everything has been said better and more poignant
There does not seem like much sense repeating
What a woman can find in countless novels
Their characters far more whimsical and charming
Seemingly hopeless but full of hope
Unlike my mind and its constant thoughts
I am getting good at blocking out failure
Knowing it is a tear meant to fall from me
The music will always play its pearls
Even I cannot make them dull in my heart
A room spins with happy party people
I am smiling but does it actually show
How infrequent this actually occurs
At least I am trying or appearing to
No one can dissect themselves completely
The blood will eventually become too much
Bleeding my words has been normal to me
Now it is seems like I have never been inspired
Learning to write again is not like riding a bike
I am constantly falling and not ready to hurt
All of that is somewhere in the past
Where the love grew but died
Perhaps next April or next May
There will be a love to write about.
05/08/08
"I went to see the gypsy the other night, she looked in my palm, looked me in the eye, said you're a lucky man, some folks got fortune, some got eyes of blue, what you got will always see you through, you're a lucky man...."
The above lyrics are from Bruce Springsteen's Lucky Man (which I could find a youtube clip of). The rest of the lyrics are taken from songs off of Bruce Springsteen's latest album Magic, which is really good.
I played poker with the boys for the first time in a couple months last night and actually made $45. Returners luck. We are all lucky to be a part of the randomness that is human life. One of us will be the last to die.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nFSFD2wXJ2E
john.
"Insects pollinating Australian tongue orchids (Cryptostylis species) frequently ejaculate and waste copious sperm," they wrote in a report in The American Naturalist."
I think the quote above from the article says enough.
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/reuters/080508/odds/odd_orchids_deception_dc
"All 17 people got their left ears sliced off," Diop told Reuters. "We rushed to the place where it happened but we did not find the attackers," he said."
I found the story below bizarre and disturbing. Why just the left ears?
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/reuters/080508/world/international_senegal_casamance_dc
"The teenager then found three identical packets on the bottom of the freezer and opened one and saw the head and arm of an infant that was wrapped in a hand towel, police said."
As disturbing as the story above is, this one is equally as disturbing.
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5hsUSwR5Ai6n-HWj3tNdxUNA3zDyQD90FJ0S00
"My father said "Son, we're lucky in this town, it's a beautiful place to be born. It just wraps its arms around you, nobody crowds you and nobody goes it alone"
http://youtube.com/watch?v=PwLfgH6D_EA
The following is from the book I am currently reading called Bloodletting and Miraculous Cures by Vincent Lam.
"Blood bears the curse of human malice. This life fluid may conceal destruction, the way words and thoughts can kill unseen. Within blood the idea of death can flow."
"I removed the watch, turned it over. The watch was perfect, unmarked. The human bite is the dirtiest, the most foul, and destined for infection. Worse than dogs or cats, because the human mouth is full of filth."
"I got shackles on my wrist, soon I'll slip 'em and be gone, Chain me in a box in the river and I'll rise singin' this song..."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=WCVJny3Va4I
I actually felt like writing something yesterday, it wasn't magic and it didn't capture what I was trying to but it is something.
Not Capturing It
There has been a lack of creativity
Emanating from deep inside of me
During the last month or even longer
I have little desire to imagine or create
Observing life as usual but not capturing it
April quickly became May and now June waits
This city’s trees are more green and vibrant
Sunlight appears but does not always stay
Arriving like an expected and welcomed guest
Leaving like a lover wanting more time
I have come to some realizations lately
Not being ready for much and especially love
Giving up on writing and choosing to read instead
Everything has been said better and more poignant
There does not seem like much sense repeating
What a woman can find in countless novels
Their characters far more whimsical and charming
Seemingly hopeless but full of hope
Unlike my mind and its constant thoughts
I am getting good at blocking out failure
Knowing it is a tear meant to fall from me
The music will always play its pearls
Even I cannot make them dull in my heart
A room spins with happy party people
I am smiling but does it actually show
How infrequent this actually occurs
At least I am trying or appearing to
No one can dissect themselves completely
The blood will eventually become too much
Bleeding my words has been normal to me
Now it is seems like I have never been inspired
Learning to write again is not like riding a bike
I am constantly falling and not ready to hurt
All of that is somewhere in the past
Where the love grew but died
Perhaps next April or next May
There will be a love to write about.
05/08/08
"I went to see the gypsy the other night, she looked in my palm, looked me in the eye, said you're a lucky man, some folks got fortune, some got eyes of blue, what you got will always see you through, you're a lucky man...."
The above lyrics are from Bruce Springsteen's Lucky Man (which I could find a youtube clip of). The rest of the lyrics are taken from songs off of Bruce Springsteen's latest album Magic, which is really good.
I played poker with the boys for the first time in a couple months last night and actually made $45. Returners luck. We are all lucky to be a part of the randomness that is human life. One of us will be the last to die.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nFSFD2wXJ2E
john.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
"I'll tell you one more thing, I confess to self deception, pull the lock and pry it open...."
Well I got a new cellphone to replace the one I lost because I was an idiot. I didn't get anything overly fancy, just a LG Shine which is a little bit of an upgrade from the Krazor. What a fiasco losing the phone turned into. I might surgically implant this one into my body, to keep from losing it.
Yesterday was my parent's 31st wedding anniversary and it amazes that anyone can stay married. I am 30 and can't imagine that kind of commitment coming from me any time soon. My mother's parents, my aunt, my cousin, myself and my parents went out to dinner to celebrate. It was a pretty good meal.
It rained like it was April yesterday and the weather seems about 2 weeks behind where it should be. Though I have noticed plenty of tulips and other new flowers blooming beautifully.
"Now hang me up to dry, you wrung me out, too too too many times....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=l9hYnWZQrxY
Television's favourite Canadian grandmother and sex therapist Sue Johanson is going off the air. Her show began in Canada as a radio call in show, then Canadian television call in show and has been airing for the last 6 years in the United States on the Oxygen network. I knew her show was still on but I have never head of the Oxygen network. Anyway the story is below along with a link from her last appearance on the Letterman show. She is a great guest, being 77 and using words that make Dave cringe. (Well I couldn't find it)
http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/TV/05/07/tv.sunday.night.sex.ap/index.html
Habits, everyone has them and they usually define us. Apparently it is not good to resist changing them and it is better to slowly try new things. It allows you to build new brain cells. I am a creature of habit and have a hard time breaking habits. I am not against trying new things but like to be comfortable. There is a great article about habits below from the New York Times.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/04/business/04unbox.html?em&ex=1210305600&en=d23a1bdc535843e5&ei=5087%0A
The third round of the NHL playoffs start tonight with Dallas visiting Detroit. I want Dallas to win but will pick Detroit here.
"I've got one friend laying across from me, I did not choose him, he did not choose me, we've got no chance of recovery....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=XGrtSrlzs38
The Democratic party might have no chance of recovery after Hillary and Obama have been allowed to divide the party longer than necessary. Hillary should give up and now. On Tuesday she barely won Indiana 51%-49%, while Obama won North Carolina 56%-42% but Hillary vows to keep fighting. I respect that and wanted her as the nominee but what is happening now isn't good for their party and America. It just shows how flawed the nomination process is and how much money can be wasted, when it should be going to its citizens.
Between Tuesday and Wednesday I watched the movie The Savages, Laura Linney and Phillip Seymour Hoffman and that it was pretty good. I am a big fan both actors and dysfunctional family movies which this one was. The more dysfunctional, the better. Real life is more dysfunctional than we might admit to. Even we ourselves are. Normal might easily be defined as dysfunctional but not in a bad way. A review of The Savages is below.
http://movies.nytimes.com/2007/11/28/movies/28sava.html
Well Cbc.ca says it is 13.1 degrees, I say it is overcast and windy. The characters coming and going from this particular Starbucks is as always interesting. That is being kind.
john.
Yesterday was my parent's 31st wedding anniversary and it amazes that anyone can stay married. I am 30 and can't imagine that kind of commitment coming from me any time soon. My mother's parents, my aunt, my cousin, myself and my parents went out to dinner to celebrate. It was a pretty good meal.
It rained like it was April yesterday and the weather seems about 2 weeks behind where it should be. Though I have noticed plenty of tulips and other new flowers blooming beautifully.
"Now hang me up to dry, you wrung me out, too too too many times....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=l9hYnWZQrxY
Television's favourite Canadian grandmother and sex therapist Sue Johanson is going off the air. Her show began in Canada as a radio call in show, then Canadian television call in show and has been airing for the last 6 years in the United States on the Oxygen network. I knew her show was still on but I have never head of the Oxygen network. Anyway the story is below along with a link from her last appearance on the Letterman show. She is a great guest, being 77 and using words that make Dave cringe. (Well I couldn't find it)
http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/TV/05/07/tv.sunday.night.sex.ap/index.html
Habits, everyone has them and they usually define us. Apparently it is not good to resist changing them and it is better to slowly try new things. It allows you to build new brain cells. I am a creature of habit and have a hard time breaking habits. I am not against trying new things but like to be comfortable. There is a great article about habits below from the New York Times.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/04/business/04unbox.html?em&ex=1210305600&en=d23a1bdc535843e5&ei=5087%0A
The third round of the NHL playoffs start tonight with Dallas visiting Detroit. I want Dallas to win but will pick Detroit here.
"I've got one friend laying across from me, I did not choose him, he did not choose me, we've got no chance of recovery....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=XGrtSrlzs38
The Democratic party might have no chance of recovery after Hillary and Obama have been allowed to divide the party longer than necessary. Hillary should give up and now. On Tuesday she barely won Indiana 51%-49%, while Obama won North Carolina 56%-42% but Hillary vows to keep fighting. I respect that and wanted her as the nominee but what is happening now isn't good for their party and America. It just shows how flawed the nomination process is and how much money can be wasted, when it should be going to its citizens.
Between Tuesday and Wednesday I watched the movie The Savages, Laura Linney and Phillip Seymour Hoffman and that it was pretty good. I am a big fan both actors and dysfunctional family movies which this one was. The more dysfunctional, the better. Real life is more dysfunctional than we might admit to. Even we ourselves are. Normal might easily be defined as dysfunctional but not in a bad way. A review of The Savages is below.
http://movies.nytimes.com/2007/11/28/movies/28sava.html
Well Cbc.ca says it is 13.1 degrees, I say it is overcast and windy. The characters coming and going from this particular Starbucks is as always interesting. That is being kind.
john.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
"Asleep in perfect blue buildings, beside the green apple sea, gonna get me a little oblivion, baby, and try to keep myself away from me......"
The start of this week is not going great. My cellphone is permanently lost and I guess that is what I get for drinking too much. I fucked up my laptop for a day or so and it is working fine now, but only with a wireless mouse, its keypad mouse is not working. I probably spilt something on it. The strap on my bag broke and I think I have an ulcer. Other than that everything is wonderful.
"Margery's dreaming of horses, looking at a green sky, sun like a red eye, bright blue horses are the fortune she lives by, she's tired and lonely, scared and depressed, her visions of one day go racing the next....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=w5oFRhb_11k
I did pick up a couple of books on Monday to fill the void left after I finished Half Of A Yellow Sun. The books are Bloodletting and Miraculous Cures by Vincent Lam and Hotel du Lac by Anita Brookner. I am about a 100 pages into Bloodletting and it is holding my attention rather well, unlike life itself.
Another Horse Dreamer's Blues is such an underrated Counting Crows song from Recovering The Satellites, I wish they would play it live. Check out the clip above to hear the song. The clip below is a companion song to Another Horsedreamer's Blues called Margery Dream's Of Horses, they haven't released a studio version of it and only played it live a few times. I would love a studio version.
"Dust me off and shut me down and dream of where I haven't been, close the door inside my heart, stuck in the south Atlantic wind....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=9hSyqv4qoeY
I should have a million other things to say but I don't feel like it. I haven't written much lately and would rather read what other's have written. It is a lot easier and less emotionally draining.
"Maria came from Nashville with a suitcase in her hand, she said she'd like to meet a boy who looks like Elvis and she walks along the edge of where the ocean meets the land, just like she's walking on a wire in the circus...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=AbEnXCCgiGc
http://youtube.com/watch?v=J8q6eEPWhIw
Around here it is 15 degrees and the sun is sinking. I have the Blue Jays game on mute, so that I can watch and provide my own colourful commentary. It hasn't been pleasant. Below is my countdown, You Can't Count On Me by Counting Crows remains at #1. Above I couldn't decide which version of their song Round Here I wanted to post, so there are 2, the first one is from Letterman where they followed Madonna's memorable swearing appearance and the second one is from earlier this year. It can only get better. I suppose.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ffi6-89mYHk
jr.
Top 100 Songs Played This Year On My iTunes Player
1. You Can't Count On Me by Counting Crows (1)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=MFou5gU9c9A
2. When I Dream Of Michelangelo by Counting Crows (4)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=SuVXF9os6Gw
3. Creep by Radiohead (3)
4. The One I Love by David Gray (2)
5. Have You Ever Seen The Rain? by C.C.R. (5)
6. Long Road To Ruin by Foo Fighters (6)
7. Thinking About You by Norah Jones (7)
8. Sunday Morning Coming Down (Live) by Johnny Cash (10)
9. If I Had Eyes by Jack Johnson (11)
10. Cowboys by Counting Crows (15)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Nae39OSzKrU
11. Say It To Me Now by Glen Hansard (12)
12. Always by Neverending White Lights (18)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ytwDJGgE8VQ
13. Empty by Ray LaMontagne (29)
14. One by U2 (8)
15. Imitation Of Life by R.E.M. (9)
16. Wonderwall by Oasis (19)
17. Calling All Friends by Low Stars (17)
18. Guaranteed by Eddie Vedder (13)
19. Blanket Of Ghosts by Dustin Kensrue (14)
20. Hard Sun by Eddie Vedder (16)
21. Society by Eddie Vedder (28)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=SVQEsKDcl2A
22. Where The Streets Have No Name by U2 (21)
23. Let It Ride by Ryan Adams (20)
24. Hannah by Ray LaMontagne (23)
25. NYC by Interpol (25)
26. Falling Slowly by The Frames (27)
27. Southern Girl by Amos Lee (30)
28. Love Hurts by Incubus (26)
29. Boy With A Coin by Iron and Wine (33)
30. When You Were Young by The Killers (41)
31. Everything by Michael Buble (53)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=LEn-eHT7kMM
32. The Great Escape by Patrick Watson (24)
33. The Bends by Radiohead (40)
34. Everybody Knows by Ryan Adams (22)
35. Lemon Parade by Tonic (35)
36. Tupelo Honey by Van Morrison (37)
37. My List by The Killers (34)
38. Montebello Park by The Trews (36)
39. Jumpin' Jack Flash by The Rolling Stones (39)
40. Talk Shows On Mute by Incubus (32)
41. No Sugar Tonight/New Mother Nature by The Guess Who (42)
42. Oceanside by The Decemberists (51)
43. Have You Seen Me Lately? (Acoustic) by Counting Crows (31)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=bv3Bdh9jNRk
44. Waiting by City and Colour (64)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=V3Ad7H0X13Y
45. Baby I Love Your Way by Bob Marley (49)
46. Diamonds On The Inside by Ben Harper (45)
47. Michelle by The Beatles (46)
48. A Long December by Counting Crows (44)
49. The Weight by The Band (48)
50. Let It Be by The Beatles (47)
51. Sleep Don't Weep by Damien Rice (62)
52. Tripping Billies (Live) by Dave Matthews with Tim Reynolds (43)
53. Anna Molly by Incubus (52)
54. You're Beautiful (Acoustic) by James Blunt (NR)
55. Love Stoned by Justin Timberlake (60)
56. Black Star (Acoustic) by Radiohead (89)
57. The Blues by Switchfoot (38)
58. Please Be Patient With Me by Wilco (55)
59. With Or Without You by U2 (54)
60. Jigsaw Falling Into Place by Radiohead (84)
61. Alert Status Red by Matthew Good (57)
62. Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd (81)
63. The River by Live (59)
64. Your Heart Is An Empty Room by Death Cab For Cutie (78)
65. Rootless Tree by Damien Rice (50)
66. High Life by Counting Crows (72)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=tSZEzLyaSjA
67. Antichrist Television Blues by The Arcade Fire (68)
68. Long Line Of Pain by Amos Lee (NR)
69. Elephant by Damien Rice (71)
70. Miller's Angels by Counting Crows (77)
71. St. Robinson In His Cadillac Dream (Live) by Counting Crows (73)
72. Up On Cripple Creek by The Band (NR)
73. Is There A Ghost? by Band Of Horses (NR)
74. Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds by The Beatles (NR)
75. Against The Wind by Bob Seger (66)
76. No Breaks by The Bravery (NR)
77. All I Ever Wanted (Live) by Brian Melo (75)
78. Some Surprise by The Cake Sale (Featuring Lisa Hannigan and Gary Lightbody) (65)
79. The Hardest Part by Coldplay (76)
80. 1492 by Counting Crows (88)
81. So Long, So Long by Dashboard Confessional with Adam Duritz (NR)
82. The Crane Wife 3 by The Decemberists (70)
83. 1973 by James Blunt (NR)
84. Ramble On by Led Zeppelin (NR)
85. Goodnight, Goodnight by Maroon 5 (58)
86. All I Need by Radiohead (69)
87. Can I Stay by Ray LaMontagne (NR)
88. Thank You by The Redwalls (85)
89. Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright (86)
90. Club Thing by Yoav (87)
91. Twist and Shout by The Beatles (67)
92. Daylight Fading by Counting Crows (63)
93. O Valencia by The Decemberists (61)
94. Fake Plastic Trees (Live) by Radiohead (56)
95. Sullivan Street (Live) by Counting Crows (NR)
96. Ashes Of American Flags by Wilco (NR)
97. Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison (92)
98. The Con by Tegan and Sara (94)
99. Your Ex-Lover Is Dead by Stars (95)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=a2yJSFHTrgM
100. Bridge To Nowhere by Sam Roberts (NR)
"Margery's dreaming of horses, looking at a green sky, sun like a red eye, bright blue horses are the fortune she lives by, she's tired and lonely, scared and depressed, her visions of one day go racing the next....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=w5oFRhb_11k
I did pick up a couple of books on Monday to fill the void left after I finished Half Of A Yellow Sun. The books are Bloodletting and Miraculous Cures by Vincent Lam and Hotel du Lac by Anita Brookner. I am about a 100 pages into Bloodletting and it is holding my attention rather well, unlike life itself.
Another Horse Dreamer's Blues is such an underrated Counting Crows song from Recovering The Satellites, I wish they would play it live. Check out the clip above to hear the song. The clip below is a companion song to Another Horsedreamer's Blues called Margery Dream's Of Horses, they haven't released a studio version of it and only played it live a few times. I would love a studio version.
"Dust me off and shut me down and dream of where I haven't been, close the door inside my heart, stuck in the south Atlantic wind....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=9hSyqv4qoeY
I should have a million other things to say but I don't feel like it. I haven't written much lately and would rather read what other's have written. It is a lot easier and less emotionally draining.
"Maria came from Nashville with a suitcase in her hand, she said she'd like to meet a boy who looks like Elvis and she walks along the edge of where the ocean meets the land, just like she's walking on a wire in the circus...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=AbEnXCCgiGc
http://youtube.com/watch?v=J8q6eEPWhIw
Around here it is 15 degrees and the sun is sinking. I have the Blue Jays game on mute, so that I can watch and provide my own colourful commentary. It hasn't been pleasant. Below is my countdown, You Can't Count On Me by Counting Crows remains at #1. Above I couldn't decide which version of their song Round Here I wanted to post, so there are 2, the first one is from Letterman where they followed Madonna's memorable swearing appearance and the second one is from earlier this year. It can only get better. I suppose.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ffi6-89mYHk
jr.
Top 100 Songs Played This Year On My iTunes Player
1. You Can't Count On Me by Counting Crows (1)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=MFou5gU9c9A
2. When I Dream Of Michelangelo by Counting Crows (4)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=SuVXF9os6Gw
3. Creep by Radiohead (3)
4. The One I Love by David Gray (2)
5. Have You Ever Seen The Rain? by C.C.R. (5)
6. Long Road To Ruin by Foo Fighters (6)
7. Thinking About You by Norah Jones (7)
8. Sunday Morning Coming Down (Live) by Johnny Cash (10)
9. If I Had Eyes by Jack Johnson (11)
10. Cowboys by Counting Crows (15)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Nae39OSzKrU
11. Say It To Me Now by Glen Hansard (12)
12. Always by Neverending White Lights (18)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ytwDJGgE8VQ
13. Empty by Ray LaMontagne (29)
14. One by U2 (8)
15. Imitation Of Life by R.E.M. (9)
16. Wonderwall by Oasis (19)
17. Calling All Friends by Low Stars (17)
18. Guaranteed by Eddie Vedder (13)
19. Blanket Of Ghosts by Dustin Kensrue (14)
20. Hard Sun by Eddie Vedder (16)
21. Society by Eddie Vedder (28)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=SVQEsKDcl2A
22. Where The Streets Have No Name by U2 (21)
23. Let It Ride by Ryan Adams (20)
24. Hannah by Ray LaMontagne (23)
25. NYC by Interpol (25)
26. Falling Slowly by The Frames (27)
27. Southern Girl by Amos Lee (30)
28. Love Hurts by Incubus (26)
29. Boy With A Coin by Iron and Wine (33)
30. When You Were Young by The Killers (41)
31. Everything by Michael Buble (53)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=LEn-eHT7kMM
32. The Great Escape by Patrick Watson (24)
33. The Bends by Radiohead (40)
34. Everybody Knows by Ryan Adams (22)
35. Lemon Parade by Tonic (35)
36. Tupelo Honey by Van Morrison (37)
37. My List by The Killers (34)
38. Montebello Park by The Trews (36)
39. Jumpin' Jack Flash by The Rolling Stones (39)
40. Talk Shows On Mute by Incubus (32)
41. No Sugar Tonight/New Mother Nature by The Guess Who (42)
42. Oceanside by The Decemberists (51)
43. Have You Seen Me Lately? (Acoustic) by Counting Crows (31)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=bv3Bdh9jNRk
44. Waiting by City and Colour (64)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=V3Ad7H0X13Y
45. Baby I Love Your Way by Bob Marley (49)
46. Diamonds On The Inside by Ben Harper (45)
47. Michelle by The Beatles (46)
48. A Long December by Counting Crows (44)
49. The Weight by The Band (48)
50. Let It Be by The Beatles (47)
51. Sleep Don't Weep by Damien Rice (62)
52. Tripping Billies (Live) by Dave Matthews with Tim Reynolds (43)
53. Anna Molly by Incubus (52)
54. You're Beautiful (Acoustic) by James Blunt (NR)
55. Love Stoned by Justin Timberlake (60)
56. Black Star (Acoustic) by Radiohead (89)
57. The Blues by Switchfoot (38)
58. Please Be Patient With Me by Wilco (55)
59. With Or Without You by U2 (54)
60. Jigsaw Falling Into Place by Radiohead (84)
61. Alert Status Red by Matthew Good (57)
62. Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd (81)
63. The River by Live (59)
64. Your Heart Is An Empty Room by Death Cab For Cutie (78)
65. Rootless Tree by Damien Rice (50)
66. High Life by Counting Crows (72)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=tSZEzLyaSjA
67. Antichrist Television Blues by The Arcade Fire (68)
68. Long Line Of Pain by Amos Lee (NR)
69. Elephant by Damien Rice (71)
70. Miller's Angels by Counting Crows (77)
71. St. Robinson In His Cadillac Dream (Live) by Counting Crows (73)
72. Up On Cripple Creek by The Band (NR)
73. Is There A Ghost? by Band Of Horses (NR)
74. Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds by The Beatles (NR)
75. Against The Wind by Bob Seger (66)
76. No Breaks by The Bravery (NR)
77. All I Ever Wanted (Live) by Brian Melo (75)
78. Some Surprise by The Cake Sale (Featuring Lisa Hannigan and Gary Lightbody) (65)
79. The Hardest Part by Coldplay (76)
80. 1492 by Counting Crows (88)
81. So Long, So Long by Dashboard Confessional with Adam Duritz (NR)
82. The Crane Wife 3 by The Decemberists (70)
83. 1973 by James Blunt (NR)
84. Ramble On by Led Zeppelin (NR)
85. Goodnight, Goodnight by Maroon 5 (58)
86. All I Need by Radiohead (69)
87. Can I Stay by Ray LaMontagne (NR)
88. Thank You by The Redwalls (85)
89. Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright (86)
90. Club Thing by Yoav (87)
91. Twist and Shout by The Beatles (67)
92. Daylight Fading by Counting Crows (63)
93. O Valencia by The Decemberists (61)
94. Fake Plastic Trees (Live) by Radiohead (56)
95. Sullivan Street (Live) by Counting Crows (NR)
96. Ashes Of American Flags by Wilco (NR)
97. Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison (92)
98. The Con by Tegan and Sara (94)
99. Your Ex-Lover Is Dead by Stars (95)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=a2yJSFHTrgM
100. Bridge To Nowhere by Sam Roberts (NR)
Sunday, May 4, 2008
"People come, people go, some grow young, some grow cold, I woke up in between a memory and a dream......"
I am slow, hungover and tired today. My friend Dave's girlfriend Crystal had people over to her place to celebrate her birthday last night. About 30 people showed up and filled up (literally) her 1 bedroom apartment. I had a lot of fun and might not have been the most socially awkward person there. The only thing that sucked about the night was that I lost my cellphone. Who knows where. I had it at 4 because I made calls with it and even phoned my own line, which makes no sense because there would be no one there to answer it. I didn't leave myself a message. I swear it was the gold slagger shots but it might just have been ALL the alcohol. I think I left it in the cab but haven't heard back from them yet. The party offered the entertainment of Rock Band and Mario Kart for the WII. I absolutely loved the old game for the Nintendo 64, so this one will have to grow on me along with its steering wheel controller. I only managed to spill my drink once that I remember and of course that had to be on someone, only a little bit though. It was nice to get out again this weekend because after Tuesday my week pretty much sucked. I try so hard to avoid the highs and lows of daily life but I am not usually good at it. I am getting better but there are still too many days when I don't feel like being around anyone. Though when I am around certain people it makes it easier.
"Some days are diamonds, some days are rocks, some doors are open, some roads are blocked, sundowns are golden then fade away but if I never do nothing..."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=zJl0pe-DWy8
The poem below is basically about how it is easier to be strangers than friends with anyone. It takes little effort to be a stranger to another person, even if you know them or did know them. At least this is my opinion. But I suppose it all goes back to the fact that people come into and out of our lives for a reason.
Easier Being Strangers
My skin flakes and peels
An April tan quickly fading
The phone rings and stops
Outside May is unappealing
I was happier last week
Kindness made me smile
The sun brought hope
For those in the park
Who were exposed
Reading and laughing
Running and playing
Today there is only cloud
Stories of floods and tornadoes
A good book already finished
Finds its way into the closet
We used to share books
Now all there is silence
I knew this would happen
When we said goodbye
On a familiar street corner
Below a London July sky
I wrote down the date
Should I become less mindful
Letting too many people in
Knowing they will only go
The way you have already
Though blame is inevitable
I choose not to offer it
Accepting silence as permanency
It is easier being strangers
Than it was ever being friends
Rain applauds like golf fans
Quietly tapping at my window
I could be right about this
My conclusions are pretty good
When I believe in my observations
Letting instincts write freely
There is no reason to sugar coat
What has always been sour
I gave you a lot of my time
Sharing things previously hoarded
Rice in a third world country
Would be a good analogy
But fortunately I will not starve
In your absence and silence
People are like seasons
They arrive nosily and leave quietly
Burning our heart and peeling our skin.
05/02/08
"Into the great wide open, under them skies of blue, out in the great wide open, a rebel without a clue....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Y-gVVGD7j3E
Yesterday was a big sports day with the running of 134th Kentucky Derby and with game 5 between Philadelphia and Montreal. I suppose I will start with the disappointment of the hockey game. I actually liked this Montreal team, not just because they were a Canadian team but because of players like Kovalev, Andrei and Sergei Kostitsyn and the Montreal fans. But in the end their rookie goalie Price was human and perhaps Halak should have played in game 6 as well, he wasn't the reason they lost game 5. I picked Montreal and their loss makes me 7-3 in the playoffs. I also picked New York who were eliminated this afternoon by the Penguins, that makes me 7-4, I know it is just getting worse. I like the Penguins, don't get me wrong, I just didn't think this is their year but it might be. I will pick Pittsburgh to beat Philadelphia in the battle of Pennsylvania, 4-2.
Now on to the Kentucky Derby, I love watching this race but ignore all the hype. The 2 minutes is what it is all about, nothing against Bob Costas and the stories NBC fills its prerace coverage with. This year's race was won by Big Brown, the favourite and the favourite coming from post position #20, somewhere down in Indiana. Big Brown stalked the field until the stretch and then tore for home leaving the other horses in the dust. Finishing second was the filly Eight Belles but just after the finishing the race, she went down and was euthanized. This cast a cloud over Big Brown victory's because it highlighted what can be a cruel reality for these animals. Below is an article about the horse and how its trainer doesn't blame the sport for its death.
http://www.baltimoresun.com/sports/horseracing/bal-derby050508,0,6957257.story
I worked for a few years in management for two small Harness racing tracks and can only imagine the preparation for 157,700 people which was the crowd at yesterday's derby. There was over 12 Million dollars wagered on track and there were days when we were lucky to get $12 dollars wagered, okay a little more but it wasn't much. In total there was $114,557,364 wagered on the race. Big Brown paid $6.80 to win and Eight Belles paid $10.60 to place. The owners of Big Brown got paid $1,451,800 for its victory. Not bad for a horse named after UPS.
I can't concentrate anymore. Enjoy what is left of your Sunday. It is currently 11 degress here, windy and cloudy. Nicer weather is coming tomorrow. Put on some Tom Petty and relax.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=JWG-xOO9h5o
jr.
"Some days are diamonds, some days are rocks, some doors are open, some roads are blocked, sundowns are golden then fade away but if I never do nothing..."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=zJl0pe-DWy8
The poem below is basically about how it is easier to be strangers than friends with anyone. It takes little effort to be a stranger to another person, even if you know them or did know them. At least this is my opinion. But I suppose it all goes back to the fact that people come into and out of our lives for a reason.
Easier Being Strangers
My skin flakes and peels
An April tan quickly fading
The phone rings and stops
Outside May is unappealing
I was happier last week
Kindness made me smile
The sun brought hope
For those in the park
Who were exposed
Reading and laughing
Running and playing
Today there is only cloud
Stories of floods and tornadoes
A good book already finished
Finds its way into the closet
We used to share books
Now all there is silence
I knew this would happen
When we said goodbye
On a familiar street corner
Below a London July sky
I wrote down the date
Should I become less mindful
Letting too many people in
Knowing they will only go
The way you have already
Though blame is inevitable
I choose not to offer it
Accepting silence as permanency
It is easier being strangers
Than it was ever being friends
Rain applauds like golf fans
Quietly tapping at my window
I could be right about this
My conclusions are pretty good
When I believe in my observations
Letting instincts write freely
There is no reason to sugar coat
What has always been sour
I gave you a lot of my time
Sharing things previously hoarded
Rice in a third world country
Would be a good analogy
But fortunately I will not starve
In your absence and silence
People are like seasons
They arrive nosily and leave quietly
Burning our heart and peeling our skin.
05/02/08
"Into the great wide open, under them skies of blue, out in the great wide open, a rebel without a clue....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Y-gVVGD7j3E
Yesterday was a big sports day with the running of 134th Kentucky Derby and with game 5 between Philadelphia and Montreal. I suppose I will start with the disappointment of the hockey game. I actually liked this Montreal team, not just because they were a Canadian team but because of players like Kovalev, Andrei and Sergei Kostitsyn and the Montreal fans. But in the end their rookie goalie Price was human and perhaps Halak should have played in game 6 as well, he wasn't the reason they lost game 5. I picked Montreal and their loss makes me 7-3 in the playoffs. I also picked New York who were eliminated this afternoon by the Penguins, that makes me 7-4, I know it is just getting worse. I like the Penguins, don't get me wrong, I just didn't think this is their year but it might be. I will pick Pittsburgh to beat Philadelphia in the battle of Pennsylvania, 4-2.
Now on to the Kentucky Derby, I love watching this race but ignore all the hype. The 2 minutes is what it is all about, nothing against Bob Costas and the stories NBC fills its prerace coverage with. This year's race was won by Big Brown, the favourite and the favourite coming from post position #20, somewhere down in Indiana. Big Brown stalked the field until the stretch and then tore for home leaving the other horses in the dust. Finishing second was the filly Eight Belles but just after the finishing the race, she went down and was euthanized. This cast a cloud over Big Brown victory's because it highlighted what can be a cruel reality for these animals. Below is an article about the horse and how its trainer doesn't blame the sport for its death.
http://www.baltimoresun.com/sports/horseracing/bal-derby050508,0,6957257.story
I worked for a few years in management for two small Harness racing tracks and can only imagine the preparation for 157,700 people which was the crowd at yesterday's derby. There was over 12 Million dollars wagered on track and there were days when we were lucky to get $12 dollars wagered, okay a little more but it wasn't much. In total there was $114,557,364 wagered on the race. Big Brown paid $6.80 to win and Eight Belles paid $10.60 to place. The owners of Big Brown got paid $1,451,800 for its victory. Not bad for a horse named after UPS.
I can't concentrate anymore. Enjoy what is left of your Sunday. It is currently 11 degress here, windy and cloudy. Nicer weather is coming tomorrow. Put on some Tom Petty and relax.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=JWG-xOO9h5o
jr.
Friday, May 2, 2008
"Every spark of friendship and love will die without a home......."
Friday is as good a day as any to post some odd news links. The world is a strange and often stupid place, as its citizens prove every day. Though certain stories make for a good laugh like our own missteps should. If you think too much about something or not enough about something, it is bound to be a disaster.
"They know my name ‘cause I told it to them but they don’t know where and they don’t know when, it's coming, oh when? But it's coming, keep the car running..."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=bFFpL6Jj5II
The first odd news story is that of a 21 year old man from Texas who tried to cash a forged cheque for 360 Billion dollars. He claims his girlfriend's mother gave him the cheque to start a record business. The man was arrested on forgery charges, he was also carrying a gun illegally and had more than 50 grams of marijuana. 360 Billion dollars would buy a lot of joints, maybe that was what he was thinking.
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/080502/koddities/oddity_big_cheque
"If you still want me, please forgive me, the crown of love is fallin' from me. If you still want me, please forgive me, because the spark is not within
me...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=4QY_dkTWHfg
The second odd news story proves how fast love can turn to hate. A couple were married a month ago in the Bahama's and last weekend decided to repeat their vows before 15o friends. Back at the hotel the couple got into a fight, with the groom karate kicking the bride at which point other members of the wedding party got involved. Apparently they left jail at separate times and there next stop is probably divorce court, once Gary Coleman is done there.
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/080429/koddities/oddity_newlywed_brawl_1
"Oh God! well look at you now! Oh! you lost it, but you don’t know how! In the light of a golden calf, Oh God! I had to laugh!....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=wjxef8AfVQg
The third odd story should really be just called stupidity. The man is lucky to keep his job, you want to look at porn, don't do it at work. 780,000 times is a little obsessive, just a little.
http://www.cbc.ca/cp/Oddities/080502/K050202AU.html
The youtube clip above of The Arcade Fire performing Neon Bible in an elevator is pure genius and it blows my mind.
I finished Half Of A Yellow Sun by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie and would recommend it to anyone. The only problem I have now is that I need a new book to replace it. I guess this gives me a reason to visit the bookstores.
"He came down through fields of green, on the summer side of life, his love was ripe, there were no illusions on the summer side of life, only tenderness...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ASDHbxvhWZM
Last night the Detroit Red Wings eliminated the Colorado Avalanche from the NHL playoffs with an 8-2 victory. Johan Franzen scored 3 times giving him 11 goals in 10 games, anyone have him in their pool. I will admit I picked Colorado and the loss makes me 7-2 in the playoffs thus far. Last night's game might also have been Colorado's Joe Sakic's last game ever. Sakic is 38 and says he will wait until the summer to decide. Sakic is a first ballot Half of Fame player and a Canadian hockey legend. While playing for our country he won an Olympic gold, a World Cup gold, a World Hockey Championship gold and a World Junior Championship gold along with his 2 Stanley Cup wins with the Avalanche. His career numbers look like this 1363 games played, 623 goals and 1006 assists for 1629 points. His career playoff numbers look like this 171 games played, 84 goals and 102 assists for 186 points. If anyone deserves to live life on the summer side, it is Burnaby Joe. Like Mr. Lightfoot he is an Canadian icon.
It is very overcast right now, 14 degrees and looks like it might even be spitting rain.
Enjoy your weekend. You might not need an intervention but you can never go wrong listening to the song by The Arcade Fire.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZO7ZWfvCjBE
John.
"They know my name ‘cause I told it to them but they don’t know where and they don’t know when, it's coming, oh when? But it's coming, keep the car running..."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=bFFpL6Jj5II
The first odd news story is that of a 21 year old man from Texas who tried to cash a forged cheque for 360 Billion dollars. He claims his girlfriend's mother gave him the cheque to start a record business. The man was arrested on forgery charges, he was also carrying a gun illegally and had more than 50 grams of marijuana. 360 Billion dollars would buy a lot of joints, maybe that was what he was thinking.
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/080502/koddities/oddity_big_cheque
"If you still want me, please forgive me, the crown of love is fallin' from me. If you still want me, please forgive me, because the spark is not within
me...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=4QY_dkTWHfg
The second odd news story proves how fast love can turn to hate. A couple were married a month ago in the Bahama's and last weekend decided to repeat their vows before 15o friends. Back at the hotel the couple got into a fight, with the groom karate kicking the bride at which point other members of the wedding party got involved. Apparently they left jail at separate times and there next stop is probably divorce court, once Gary Coleman is done there.
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/080429/koddities/oddity_newlywed_brawl_1
"Oh God! well look at you now! Oh! you lost it, but you don’t know how! In the light of a golden calf, Oh God! I had to laugh!....."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=wjxef8AfVQg
The third odd story should really be just called stupidity. The man is lucky to keep his job, you want to look at porn, don't do it at work. 780,000 times is a little obsessive, just a little.
http://www.cbc.ca/cp/Oddities/080502/K050202AU.html
The youtube clip above of The Arcade Fire performing Neon Bible in an elevator is pure genius and it blows my mind.
I finished Half Of A Yellow Sun by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie and would recommend it to anyone. The only problem I have now is that I need a new book to replace it. I guess this gives me a reason to visit the bookstores.
"He came down through fields of green, on the summer side of life, his love was ripe, there were no illusions on the summer side of life, only tenderness...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ASDHbxvhWZM
Last night the Detroit Red Wings eliminated the Colorado Avalanche from the NHL playoffs with an 8-2 victory. Johan Franzen scored 3 times giving him 11 goals in 10 games, anyone have him in their pool. I will admit I picked Colorado and the loss makes me 7-2 in the playoffs thus far. Last night's game might also have been Colorado's Joe Sakic's last game ever. Sakic is 38 and says he will wait until the summer to decide. Sakic is a first ballot Half of Fame player and a Canadian hockey legend. While playing for our country he won an Olympic gold, a World Cup gold, a World Hockey Championship gold and a World Junior Championship gold along with his 2 Stanley Cup wins with the Avalanche. His career numbers look like this 1363 games played, 623 goals and 1006 assists for 1629 points. His career playoff numbers look like this 171 games played, 84 goals and 102 assists for 186 points. If anyone deserves to live life on the summer side, it is Burnaby Joe. Like Mr. Lightfoot he is an Canadian icon.
It is very overcast right now, 14 degrees and looks like it might even be spitting rain.
Enjoy your weekend. You might not need an intervention but you can never go wrong listening to the song by The Arcade Fire.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZO7ZWfvCjBE
John.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
"When the broken hearted people in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be......"
The toughest thing to do in life is to let go of someone or let something be. We are given a mind and in our minds are memories, some fade with time and some become more vivid with time. Holding on and remembering can be a way of connecting with the past but it is also a way of not moving on in the future. You can't live in your memories and live in the present. I know I have tried. New memories slip through your fingers like sand through the hour glass. The only thing you lose is time and it is your most important ally. When you are young each year is a small percentage of the years you have left but as you get older this percentage becomes greater. But it doesn't mean that you still can't make changes. Say I have 40 years left, this year would be 2.5% of the rest of my life, 2.5% is a small number, assuming I can accomplish a lot of the changes I want to. The longer I wait this percentage gets greater, taking a year to make changes at 40 would be using 3.33% of the rest of my life. I guess what I am trying to say is it is never too late to use time instead of letting it use you. If I want I can be a better person at 31, 32, 33 and so on than I am at 30. It is just a matter of letting go of the things I can't change now. I think I am getting good at this but there are setbacks. Success is not letting one bad day become two and so on. I wish I was a stronger person but I guess just believing that I can be a better person will have to do for now.
"Picture yourself in a boat on a river, with tangerine trees and marmalade skies, somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly, a girl with kaleidoscope eyes...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Q7AgIEfBq_Q
When I sit down to write poetry or my version of poetry, I like to have a cup of tea, a sharp pencil (though I do all my writing on the computer) and music playing softly. I try not to let the music influence my writing too much but it inevitably does, so parts of songs or references to songs become part of the writing. I like to twist things around and take the piece wherever the song takes me. It is not clever or good but like all songs, there are stories behind my poetry. The great Robert Frost said "I never started a poem yet whose end I knew, writing a poem is discovering." I am the same and have no idea where my writing will take me. I do know certain things, it is usually going to have elements of nature and the weather, references to musicians or their lyrics, and memories of girls I thought I loved once and how wrong I was about that. The poem I wrote last night is called Life Must Follow Its Calendars and contains traces of The Beatles Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds.
Life Must Follow Its Calendars
She unfolds her arms
Ample cleavage becoming exposed
The sun returns like a voyeur
Smiling brighter than earlier
I am a shadow in her beauty
Carefully happy and inspired
By a presence previously written
May will be returning tomorrow
April will be departing tonight
Life must follow its calendars
The breeze is slight and cool
My skin no longer feels foreign
Lucy plays in the sky above
A beetle crosses the ground below
Her eyes sparkle like diamonds
I am transformed and delirious
Suddenly absorbed with words
Previously unspoken but written
She unlocks my passion
Tears of pain explode
Bombs are quieter and safer
Where do I go without my ammunition
The real and imagined hurt
Could it simply not be needed
Has enough time passed
A fire done burning its victims
The sun dies like a lover
Beautifully colouring our sky
Lucy comes down from above
Another beetle rises from below
Her eyes disappear like bullets
I am dead or dying
Suddenly absorbed with loss
Previously unfelt but now felt
The moon is my voyeur
Illuminating less than yesterday
She will not be my lover
There are only numbers on a napkin
A name and an opportunity
I would never take advantage of.
04/30/08
"So we sailed on to the sun, till we found a sea of green, and we lived beneath the waves, in our yellow submarine......."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZIjZtgyPhS0
In February of 2007, a fishing boat combing Antarctic waters accidentally captured a colossal squid. The story has just exploded this week, over a year later, as they have decided to thaw it or it is finally thawing. Either way, scientists from around the world are mesmerized by this squid currently being held at a museum in New Zealand. The squid is 1090 pounds and if it were alive its eyeballs would be the size of beach balls. The intriguing part of the story is that the scientists believe there are even bigger squids lurking in the depths of our oceans. Nature will never stop puzzling us and if it does, it will only be because humans are extinct. A link to the story is below.
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/afp/080430/oddities/nzealand_environment_animals_squid_1
Not a perfect lead in but if you haven't seen the movie The Squid and The Whale you really should. The movie isn't about squids or whales but they are used as metaphors. It stars Jeff Daniels and Laura Linney. Below is a link to its page on Imdb.com, ignore the ignoramus who reviewed it and gave it a 2 when the average user gave it 7.7. There is always someone who just doesn't like a movie, which is their right and I am sure their favourite movie is Feel The Noise or something like that, its average rating is 1.6.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367089/
"Imagine there's no countries, it isn't hard to do, nothing to kill or die for...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=H7_6Vzj7Rng
I have been reading Half A Yellow Sun by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie for nearly 2 weeks now and have about 50 pages left. The story as I have explained before follows the lives of 5 characters through Biafra's unsuccessful bid for independence from Nigeria. There are many poignant observations about war, life and the world as it was in the late 1960's but I can't quote them all, so you should find a copy of the book. It is interesting through that there have been 2 references to the characters listening to or singing along to the Beatles music. The reach of their music in a world without today's technology and its relevance on the African continent, which was physically and culturally miles away from America and England is amazing. The following poem is part of the book.
"Were You Silent When We Died?"
Did you see photos in sixty-eight
Of children with their hair becoming rust:
Sickly patches nestled on those small heads.
Then falling off, like rotten leaves on dust?
Imagine children with arms like toothpicks,
With footballs for bellies and skin stretched thin.
It was kwashiorkor-difficult word.
A word that was not quite ugly enough, a sin.
You needn't imagine. There were photos
Displayed in gloss-filled pages of your Life.
Did you see? Did you feel sorry briefly,
Then turn round to hold your lover or wife?
Their skin had turned the tawny of weak tea
And showed cobwebs of vein and brittle bone:
Naked children laughing, as if the man
Would not take photos and then leave, alone.
The book mentions the disease Kwashiorkor often and I wasn't sure what it was exactly, so I had to look it up.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kwashiorkor
"Sounds of laughter shades of life are ringing through my open ears, exciting and inviting me, limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns, it calls me on and on across the universe......."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=JqRxi6G7Dro
The saddest and the most inspiration aspect of reading a novel like Half Of A Yellow Sun is that they continue living and laughing, even if it is not a vibrant as it was previously, their love has limits because in my opinion no human can love without limtis, but it does shine even as the bodies are burned, abandoned or buried. The hurt and loss felt by the characters in the book might be the type that you can't let it be. I hope to never know but there are things I can let be.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=67J_66hdN-I
John.
"Picture yourself in a boat on a river, with tangerine trees and marmalade skies, somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly, a girl with kaleidoscope eyes...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Q7AgIEfBq_Q
When I sit down to write poetry or my version of poetry, I like to have a cup of tea, a sharp pencil (though I do all my writing on the computer) and music playing softly. I try not to let the music influence my writing too much but it inevitably does, so parts of songs or references to songs become part of the writing. I like to twist things around and take the piece wherever the song takes me. It is not clever or good but like all songs, there are stories behind my poetry. The great Robert Frost said "I never started a poem yet whose end I knew, writing a poem is discovering." I am the same and have no idea where my writing will take me. I do know certain things, it is usually going to have elements of nature and the weather, references to musicians or their lyrics, and memories of girls I thought I loved once and how wrong I was about that. The poem I wrote last night is called Life Must Follow Its Calendars and contains traces of The Beatles Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds.
Life Must Follow Its Calendars
She unfolds her arms
Ample cleavage becoming exposed
The sun returns like a voyeur
Smiling brighter than earlier
I am a shadow in her beauty
Carefully happy and inspired
By a presence previously written
May will be returning tomorrow
April will be departing tonight
Life must follow its calendars
The breeze is slight and cool
My skin no longer feels foreign
Lucy plays in the sky above
A beetle crosses the ground below
Her eyes sparkle like diamonds
I am transformed and delirious
Suddenly absorbed with words
Previously unspoken but written
She unlocks my passion
Tears of pain explode
Bombs are quieter and safer
Where do I go without my ammunition
The real and imagined hurt
Could it simply not be needed
Has enough time passed
A fire done burning its victims
The sun dies like a lover
Beautifully colouring our sky
Lucy comes down from above
Another beetle rises from below
Her eyes disappear like bullets
I am dead or dying
Suddenly absorbed with loss
Previously unfelt but now felt
The moon is my voyeur
Illuminating less than yesterday
She will not be my lover
There are only numbers on a napkin
A name and an opportunity
I would never take advantage of.
04/30/08
"So we sailed on to the sun, till we found a sea of green, and we lived beneath the waves, in our yellow submarine......."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZIjZtgyPhS0
In February of 2007, a fishing boat combing Antarctic waters accidentally captured a colossal squid. The story has just exploded this week, over a year later, as they have decided to thaw it or it is finally thawing. Either way, scientists from around the world are mesmerized by this squid currently being held at a museum in New Zealand. The squid is 1090 pounds and if it were alive its eyeballs would be the size of beach balls. The intriguing part of the story is that the scientists believe there are even bigger squids lurking in the depths of our oceans. Nature will never stop puzzling us and if it does, it will only be because humans are extinct. A link to the story is below.
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/afp/080430/oddities/nzealand_environment_animals_squid_1
Not a perfect lead in but if you haven't seen the movie The Squid and The Whale you really should. The movie isn't about squids or whales but they are used as metaphors. It stars Jeff Daniels and Laura Linney. Below is a link to its page on Imdb.com, ignore the ignoramus who reviewed it and gave it a 2 when the average user gave it 7.7. There is always someone who just doesn't like a movie, which is their right and I am sure their favourite movie is Feel The Noise or something like that, its average rating is 1.6.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367089/
"Imagine there's no countries, it isn't hard to do, nothing to kill or die for...."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=H7_6Vzj7Rng
I have been reading Half A Yellow Sun by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie for nearly 2 weeks now and have about 50 pages left. The story as I have explained before follows the lives of 5 characters through Biafra's unsuccessful bid for independence from Nigeria. There are many poignant observations about war, life and the world as it was in the late 1960's but I can't quote them all, so you should find a copy of the book. It is interesting through that there have been 2 references to the characters listening to or singing along to the Beatles music. The reach of their music in a world without today's technology and its relevance on the African continent, which was physically and culturally miles away from America and England is amazing. The following poem is part of the book.
"Were You Silent When We Died?"
Did you see photos in sixty-eight
Of children with their hair becoming rust:
Sickly patches nestled on those small heads.
Then falling off, like rotten leaves on dust?
Imagine children with arms like toothpicks,
With footballs for bellies and skin stretched thin.
It was kwashiorkor-difficult word.
A word that was not quite ugly enough, a sin.
You needn't imagine. There were photos
Displayed in gloss-filled pages of your Life.
Did you see? Did you feel sorry briefly,
Then turn round to hold your lover or wife?
Their skin had turned the tawny of weak tea
And showed cobwebs of vein and brittle bone:
Naked children laughing, as if the man
Would not take photos and then leave, alone.
The book mentions the disease Kwashiorkor often and I wasn't sure what it was exactly, so I had to look it up.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kwashiorkor
"Sounds of laughter shades of life are ringing through my open ears, exciting and inviting me, limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns, it calls me on and on across the universe......."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=JqRxi6G7Dro
The saddest and the most inspiration aspect of reading a novel like Half Of A Yellow Sun is that they continue living and laughing, even if it is not a vibrant as it was previously, their love has limits because in my opinion no human can love without limtis, but it does shine even as the bodies are burned, abandoned or buried. The hurt and loss felt by the characters in the book might be the type that you can't let it be. I hope to never know but there are things I can let be.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=67J_66hdN-I
John.
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